JT Machinima – The Mob Rap, Pt. 5

[Grandpa Jenkins:]
Oh no! OH NO!
I recognize that creepy music!

[Stray:]
Welcome everyone, to the fifth reunion!

[Grandpa Jenkins:]
I’m gonna need you guys to wrap it up real quick!

[Stray:]
Did somebody say, “Rap”?

[Grandpa Jenkins:]
OH NO LORDY HELP ME!!!

[Stray:]
After all this time, we’ve made some changes
Come with me, see the brand new faces!
How long has it been? Hard to say!
It’s me, Skeleton, but I’ve gone astray!
Still a marksman, handy with a bow
If I hit you with an arrow, it’ll make you very slow!
I’ve been through a lot, can you tell from my clothes?
But the bars that I drop are still ice cold!

[Husk:]
I’m not a zombie, I’m just a husk!
I survive the sun from dawn to dusk
I like it hot, I’m awful sunburned
And when I punch you, I’ll hit you with hunger!
My brain is fried, my skin is charred
If I don’t kill you, you’ll just starve!
When you’re in a desert, you don’t wanna touch me!
Do I look like a guy, who’d carry sunscreen?

[Polar Bear:]
Hey extra crispy, take a seat
I’m an iced out bear, but I’ll spit some heat
You mess with my cub, and I’ll make you my snack!
Get up on my hind legs, and come down with a wack
Poke the bear, you get the claws
I’ll use your bones to floss my jaws!
Damn, that’s cold, I got ’em like burr!
By the way, don’t touch the fur

[Chorus:]
I hear them outside my door!
(Here we go again!)
I can’t take it anymore!
(Will this ever end?)
These mobs keep on comin’
They got me a runnin’
How have I survived all the way to Part 5?!
Can’t believe I still haven’t died!

[Endermite:]
I don’t have weapons to kill you with
And for the last time, I’M NOT A SILVERFISH!!
Even though that’s kinda what I’m acting like
I may be small, but my raps are tight!
Ender Pearls make Endermites!
So you better stock up on pesticide
I’ll hunt you down when I prowl around

[Enderman:]
Get some soul sand, drown it now!

[Endermite:]
STUPID ENDERMAN!

[Enderman:]
I hate these little pests!!

[Rabbit 1:]
Eh, What’s up doc?
Got any carrots, I like ’em a lot
Sorry about hoppin’ and chompin’ on your crops

[Rabbit 2:]
Somebody say carrots?

[Rabbit 1:]
That’s all that we want!
I got a big family, we’re pretty good at eating

[Chicken:]
And I thought chickens we’re the best at breeding!

[Rabbit 1:]
Run! It’s a wolf and he looks pretty hungry!

[Killer Bunny:]
He’s no match for the Killer Bunny!

[Guardian:]
Come prepared if you’re looking for Atlantis
If you breathe air, you won’t have an advantage!
Razor sharp thorns, laser beam vision
Want an easy fight? Better keep fishin’!
Our temple is ancient with treasure at the core
But it would be wise to stay ashore!
Attention squid: You should all get lost!
Touch our gold, and you will deal with our boss!
Take us out of water, and we just flop

[Chorus:]
I hear them outside my door!
(Here we go again!)
I can’t take it anymore!
(Will this ever end?)
These mobs keep on comin’
They got me a runnin’
How have I survived all the way to Part 5?!
Seriously, how am I still alive?!

[Ocelot:]
Want to pet me? not today!
(Meow!) Come close and I run away
(HISSS!) I keep my distance when I stalk my prey
Just spotted a chicken a couple blocks away!
I’ll be your cat on one condish
Keep me fed with a lot of fish!
I’ll scare the creepers and protect your home
Dogs suck! Cats own!

[Shulker:]
Welcome to the End, keep an eye on the bricks
I blend right in because I’m full of tricks!
If I hit you with a spell, it will levitate you well
And your petty arrows won’t penetrate my shell!
Don’t need a stronghold, my shell’s a fort
Hit me with a sword, and I teleport!
Our defenses will hold you for hours!
Watch your step when you climb our towers!

[Donkey:]
My back is aching…My feet are hurtin’
Why do I have to…be your servant?
I swear to Notch…you keep be workin’
I’ll put the beast…back in beast of burden!
I’m sick and tired…of bein’ treated like vermin
DON’T MAKE ME BRING MY HERD IN!!
Hee Haw! I carry more than a horse

[Horse:]
But you’re not as fast!
Kiss yourself cause you’re an ass!

[Creeper:]
Heads up! (Heads up!) Get low! (Get low!)
I’m bout (I’m bout) to blow! (to blow!)
I’m known to drop bombs a lot
And I’ve been hissin’ long before ocelots!
Y’all know me, I’m the OG mob!
I rap battle zombies and blow things up!
So you can call this my bomb track
I go out with a bang on a mob rap!

[Ghast:]
Heheh, hey, Sans and Papyrus called
They want their puns back!

[Creeper:]
Ah! Shut up, Ghast!
Nobody invited you!

[Chorus:]
I hear them outside my door!
(Here we go again!)
I can’t take it anymore!
(Will this ever end?)
These mobs keep on comin’
They got me a runnin’
How have I survived all the way to Part 5?!

[Grandpa Jenkins:]
Wow! What a horrible nightmare!
It’s OK. Just a dream. Just a dream

[Stray:]
Until Next Time…

Updated: 31 December 2017 — 23:34

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